Reading a Suspected Situation of Deceit
Tonight I was feeling all magick-y, so I bathed in lavender Epsom salts, cleaned my meditation area, brought in the four elements in crystal bowls, called in the retinue and protectors of the dharma, charged a black candle with protective power, carved my name and my son’s name into the protection candle, charged an amethyst, and dropped deep into jhana for a good 40 minutes.
The jhanas were had in King of Samadhi, which they can’t help but being, rigpa flaring, awareness-space roaring high. As with the past three times that I’ve practiced jhana, a strange literal warmth enveloped the front of my body. This is not an interior warmth; it is one that billows onto me from across the way. It is really weird, but I just notice it and go on. I made it to j7, maybe j8 briefly.
Recently, a small situation within a bigger situation arose. I have reason to believe that the key person of interest involved in the small situation assumed a false identity, an alias, and deceived some other people I know. It is really no big deal in the scheme of things, but I despise lying and was intrigued with the extent and oddness of this person’s suspected ruse, so I did a reading to look into the matter.
Here is the spread:
- Bottom: basis of the situation; Queen of Wands reversed
- Middle: what I need to know about the situation; Emperor reversed
- Left: what is in the back of my mind that I need to remember; Knight of Disks reversed
- Right: what I need to learn; King of Swords reversed
- Top: Outcome based on advice of the other cards;Two of Disks
Basis: Queen of Wands Reversed
This basis of the situation is a court card, Queen of Wands, so it likely represents a person, likely me. In reverse this card indicates a woman of goodwill who is in a situation not permitting her to exercise it. I think this means that I, although a party to the situation, have no direct power over the outcome and cannot even speak my truth about what I know and suspect.
What I Need to Know: Emperor Reversed
What I need to know about the current situation is that it is being fueled by patriarchal wrath, vengeance, abuse of power, jealousy, and shaky boundaries. The deceit I suspect is to deflect attention away from owning these feelings and dark motivations. The Emperor reversed represents to me the father who failed to protect me and who didn’t observe appropriate boundaries with me. In general, this card also represents a mother-son relationship. The Emperor, although behaving tyrannically, is really ruled by and organized around a woman, or several women, mother figures.
What I Need to Remember: Knight of Disks Reversed
What is in the back of my mind that I need to remember is that the person involved is emotionally stunted. The painting is of the Buddha as a little boy, astride the tiger of his destiny, which is enlightenment, but here that picture-perfect destiny is reversed, meaning the boy’s potential has not been realized. He is full of doubt and is projecting his weakness and smallness onto someone outside himself instead of looking within. It is projection on steroids. There is instability now, and it is producing fear. I need to remember that this person is like a child, that no more can be expected than of a child. In fact, a certain axis of development was clipped and cauterized in literal childhood.
What I Need to Learn: King of Swords Reversed
What I need to learn from this situation is that the deceiver is a dark enemy who is indeed to be completely distrusted. This is immature male air. His throne has been toppled, and he has consequently spun out of control, exploding in multiple directions. A wonderfully intellectual mind is twisted by anger, dysfunctional, and hellbent on merciless revenge. Callous, rigid brutality. Power has gone to the head and cut off the heart. The heart is stone cold. Possibly there was abuse in childhood. No appeal will get through. Deeply traumatic anger burdens this person all the time so that he does not know how to function in the normal world. He projects this burden onto others, as if they are the ones who have it and bring it. High intelligence mixed with a deprived background spells injustice: secrets, extortion, underhanded means.
The advice is to walk away from the situation. Hands off.
Outcome Based on Advice: Two of Disks
This is the outcome for me, based on the advice of the other cards, and it is the only upright card in this spread. The coins on the eyes suggest not only a kind of death, or ending, but also riches, compensation, pay dirt. One coin shows Athena, goddess of law, reason, and battle; the other coin features the Roman god Janus. Janus presides over gates, beginnings, endings, transitions, and time. He presides over the beginning and ending of war and other conflicts.
Athena looks out at the sun; Janus looks within at the moon. Looking within, I can see in the dark and illuminate secrets, like the High Priestess. This card, like the High Priestess, is about matter, the mother, the thin veil of flesh that separates us as mysterious individuals. I reside on this boundary, in and as the liminality, what separates yet joins mother and child, mother and rigpa, ground and awareness.
This card advises, in literal terms, that I assume that my suspicions are right. My vision and stance have been and are correct. Others are mediating for me, and I should assume I’ll take the prize and receive compensation, payment for my trouble.
There is much in the way of earth element, Mother Earth, in this reading, which is Ratna energy. I’ll need to research that aspect further.